It wasn’t spam until this latest email. But, now it is, the bastard.
I think the son-of-a-bitch is mocking me. I’m not sure who TUT is but I think I must have dated him.
Look, buddy, high school was a long time ago, okay? And I’m sorry about making fun of DnD, but this is the weirdest practical joke ever.

You’re welcome, Universe. It was good for me, too.
-NTZ