Anyone else would keep this to themselves

I didn’t practice loafing around all these years to start “exercising” now.
I didn’t practice loafing around all these years to start “exercising” now.
The second time was me shooting cookie pieces out of my mouth trying to apologize for the Snickers incident.
Danzig saves the Internet.
There was this time, pt 9
Loggins and Messina redemption.
John Cleese thinks I’m the best Longs Drugs employee ever.
Missing the urge to fondle me doesn’t mean that I can’t hear the fondling.
When I first started working there, there was a full-blown riot right out front of the registration office.
That doesn’t stop me from running up to him and cupping his butt with both hands. Hard.
Oh and hey! if you come across a character that won’t keep her mouth shut…
He stood every time I did and listened to me like I mattered. He kissed my hand. I think. I don’t remember if that part is true but I’m going to keep it that way in my head.